Archive for November, 20092009-11-30T13:31:26ZF, Y

*sighs*  I turn 26 this year.  That scares me soo much.  I know that I have done and experienced so much for someone my age which yes I am thankful for but when I was younger I had expected myself to have been settled down by now.  And whilst I was under 25 I figured that you only live once and I wanted to keep a firm grip on my youth and live as much as I can.  Now that I am in my mid to late twenties I do have that niggling urge to settle down.

I really want to do so many things in my life.  I want to own and run a nightclub or / and a dance studio.  I really want to learn German.  I’d love to learn to dance again.  I’d like to own a toy store.. one that sells real toys not the packaged plastic crap you buy these days… like toy stores used to be.  I want to own a nice house, have two kids and be happily married (we’re getting married in 2011.. yay!!).

There is more but I cant recall all of them.  Now the one thing in common that all of my work related goals have is that I am in most cases the owner of the establishment.  Has been this way since high school.  I have always loved helping others and loved being team leader in cadets and at school.  When I did my diploma of retail management I always said that I wanted to own a company so I can treat my employees right, as I have been in many a job where the employees have been treated like absolute crap.  The mood and comfort of your employees directly reflects your sales.

One thing I’d love to just leave uni right now and do is go through Centrelink’s NEIS (New Enterprise Incentive Scheme) Program.  It’s a course you do through them that helps you develop a business plan and start your business and they also help fund you and keep in touch with you for 52 weeks after the business opens.  I’d looovvee to have my Dance School up and running.  I could learn to dance again and help others to learn at the same time (hiring a teacher of course). *sighs*

Sad thing is that I have some major hurdles to get over.  One – somehow explaining to people that I lift my Uni coure to open a business that could potentially fail in its first 3 years of running (soo many do these days). Two – Making sure my finances are in order because if I get in trouble it not only gets me in trouble but also my fiancé and our housemate.  Three – getting over my lack of confidence to actually go and do it anyway.  I keep feeling like either I am not worthy of owning my own business or that I am going to fail at that too or that people won’t support me and that for me is HUGE as I am a people person.

Oh, I dunno hey.  I really don’t know.  I can’t do my real dream and that is to be a dancer… so this is why I want to achieve the next best thing…helping others reach their dreams.

So, the day was a scorcher.  Would have been at least 38 degrees+ in the house when I arose around midday.  Thankfully an afternoon storm rolled though around 3pm and toned the temperature down at least 5 degrees which made things so much bearable.

Saw most of that “Inglorious Basterds” movie last night.  As long winded as it was, and slow, I thought it was very cleverly written.  Had a few cool twists which kept you thinking right to the end… I loved the ending.  I’d recommend it.  I loved Brad Pitt’s accent in it tho, the faake southern american, then when he had to pretend to be italian on top, it was hilarious.

My back pains.  I played WoW for the first time in ages this evening and I have sharp back pains from sitting in this chair for so long XD.  I am only up to level 13.  Thought I was higher tan that, how embarrassing…LOL

This evening the midgee population of south east Queensland along with the flying ant society were in my kitchen hanging around the light and the kitchen table.  The little buggers were everywhere.  Had to turn off all the lights, close the windows and leave the room to get rid of em, and even with the windows shut the little buggers are still getting I somehow.  Did I mention how much I hate insects!!  The mosquito’s are out in force too.  Have been for a few days now.

Cleaned the oven today, somehow a balloon got stuck the the base of the oven tray and you could imagine our surprise when we opened the oven up, after smelling something burning to find a pile of purple goo on the bottom of the oven.  Good old turpentine got it off and then I used harsh oven cleaner to make sure the turps was gone.

I received an email yesterday from QUT advising me that I cannot do the dance subject I was hoping to do via cross-institutional study as it is not offered as an elective subject.  Now this blows my whole 6 month plan out of whack.  Now I need to think of what else I can do.  I also should book in to see someone at centrelink to be sure the whole ‘you can’t study after July’ thing still applies to me.  It was such a kick in the teeth reading that email.  Any time I try to do something I really want to do, there is something that stands in my way that I can’t argue my way out of.  People say to me that I should fight but as its bureaucracy that holds me back or money, in 99.99% of cases I can’t change it just for me.  So yesterday was my wallow in self pity day.  In fact today is a little too.

I don’t know weather I want to try to get in and do cross-institutional study doing German @ QUT or weather I should attempt to find something at Griffith or what.  *sighs*  I love life’s mountains but sometimes these mountains are steep.

Ugh, my head feels like it weighs a hundred kilos at the moment.  Damn sinuses and spring weather.  And on top of that my neck hurts too from playing SimCity Creator on the DS till sunrise sitting in bed.  I do enjoy watching the sun rise but XD

I’m going out in the morning to a meeting with a few entrepreneurial friends.  Not sure what the meeting is about precisely but I guess I’ll find out eventually.  Have to be at Chermy at half eight in the morning which means bed early for me. (Hahahaha, me,.. bed,.. early,… that’s a laugh).

Oh where do I start about that movie.  It was good, not great, not bad, just good….i think the words I am looking for are “completely fu@#ed”.  I thought fight club was a screwed up movie.  American Beauty takes the award for movie with the most messed up story line.The book must have been an awesome read because you would have been able to really get into the minds of all those screwed up people.  Makes me feel thankful for having a mildly normal life with fairly average parents and good friends.  The daughter is the only normal person in the film.  Her friend is beyond full of herself, the mum has to take the pole outa her ass, the dad is clueless, the neighbours mum lost it years ago, the neighbours dad is a war veteran that needs therapy, the neighbour has a mind too open for a healthy teenager.

My verdict – not going to watch it again unless flicking channels.  Too screwed up of an art film for my liking.